Dumb belle no more!

                                       
Women don't really need to hit the gym.
Here are some tips for the fittest you.
In just one month's time!

Stand next to the window, first thing in the morning. That is if you belong to any place other than Mumbai. Now, inhale. Smell the flowers? 
Don't forget to exhale.

Next, hold a huge pillow, a bolster's better. Hit your hubby with all your might. He's awake in a jiffy, eyes wide open.
No wasting time waking him up everyday.

Stand in the sunlit balcony. Do all asanas in full view of all neighbors. To motivate them too.
Collect coins thrown your way from admiring male viewers. Commercially viable.

Stand still for a few moments. Just look unblinkingly into the far distance. Good for the eyes. 
If some guy, a Prithviraj look alike comes into view, it's really not your fault.

Then, pound the tea masala in the mortar.. good for the muscles..sit down, enjoy your tea.
Let hubby have the paper..for a lil' feel good factor.

They've left, so take a deep breath, hold broom tight, bend forward...clean the rooms corner to corner.
Wipe intense sweat, resist urge to swear.

Then for ultra body toning, stand tiptoe, try to reach the topmost shelf. Dust objects with a clean cloth...without pause.
Takes a good fifteen minutes or so.

Now, heave half a bucket of water, bend on all fours, press down with all your might. Mop the floor like Kanta bai.
If you wish to have those great abs.

Take some rest, or you'll faint. You've never worked so hard in all your life. 
A wave of new found love for Kanta bai now sweeps all over you.

Cooking over, take the soiled iron pan, brush it spotless. Prevents upper hand fat accumulation.
No bad words please.

Both hands laden with bags of vegetables from the nearby market..weightlifter style for well toned arms..(you can do without your martyr looks...causes wrinkles)..
A full dose of vitamin D too.

In the evenings, walk outdoors briskly. Hands moving up and down, military style. For added, spectacular effect.
They'll think you've gone mad.

Saved money, with a katrina like figure, a lil' more compassionate are you now..
Certainly not the dumb belle you would have been..
Had you been to that silly Gym.